Most Powerful Weapon

The human brain is a complex thing, some tell me.  I'm not sure that's always true.  For every person, there is a point when your thoughts are simple, laid out for you, even if most of the time you need a supercomputer to decipher half of what you're thinking.  But what I find most fascinating of all, are the thoughts not based on reality, but your own imagination.

For me, my imagination is the thing that does me the most harm in this world.  It makes me feel pain worse than I should, and brings to life the darkest images from books.  A movie could never scare me the same as I can with a book and my mind.  But it also does me harm in pleasanter ways.  Every time I get my hopes up and prepare to have wonderful experiences, imagining every last detail, I get blown away with disappointment.  Not always, I often over-imagine things to the negative side as well and when that's what I expect, things will turn out to be a lot better.

Apparently I am so susceptible to my imagination and I blow things so out of proportion because I have such a great imagination.  That just makes it harder to sort out my thoughts, not even knowing the difference between my dreams and reality sometimes.  Sometimes I think of things too well, all the little details, that I make myself believe what happened was real.  Most of the time it isn't ordinary things that cloud my mind from reality, but when its something like this morning, then I really can fool myself for a while.

I wasn't feeling well so I slept in for an extra hour and fell asleep (don't worry I wasn't late for school).  When I was sleeping I actually dreamed that I got dressed and that my father took me to school.  So when I woke up it was really disorienting to find myself back in my room.  Then I got up, and tried to find the clothes I had changed into in my dream, but I could only find shirts of similar style, not colour.  Oh well.  The point is, I actually dreamed a realistic situation and was coaxed into trying to retrace my footsteps for a while.  It scared me so much, that my subconscious or whatever had this much power over my confused thoughts and actions, that I actually asked my father to go a different route from my dream.

But can I actually wrench the control of my thoughts from my own brain?  What else is there left to control it them?  My heart?  I don't think so.  I place different values on how my thoughts and emotions play on my actions, despite the fact that sometimes they get a little mixed up together.  I guess we all just have to face our overactive brains working 100 percent even while we sleep and hope they are on our side.  Humanity's side.